June 24, 2007

In my right mind

Luke 8:26–39
Jesus cast a squadron of demons out of a crazy guy. And then…

…they found the man from whom the demons had gone out, sitting at Jesus’ feet, dressed and in his right mind; and they were afraid.

At the 8 a.m. contemplative mass at St. Cuthbert’s, a twenty-minute silence follows the reading of the gospel. I listened to the story about the lonely, unclothed, crazy man who had broken his own chains again and again, but still wasn’t free, and how it was only Jesus who could clean up the nasty mess of his life.

And then I sat there for twenty minutes at Jesus’ feet thinking and feeling this:

I am in my right mind. I haven’t always been and might not always be, but for now, I am in my right mind. And I am grateful.

At 9 I headed off to visit a place and a group of people among whom I could possibly wonder if I really am in my right mind. But I went with a deep, unexpected, inexplicable peace, along with a willingness to forgive and even to see my own wrong-doing. Wow.